No shame

As my child gets older and has a growing understanding of the world around him, he is not shy about voicing his every want and desire.  Not all of these demands can be met, obviously but as a toddler he does not understand this.  And if he does that doesn't mean he agrees.  So, because of living with a walking Id, I have been called upon to throw down a white lie here and there.  And I'm sure any parent would agree with me that there is a time and place for this.  Examples:

--Theo is obsessed with coins.  He loves to hold them, talk about them, sort them, and throw them.  If one falls out of your jeans he can hear it hit the floor five rooms away.  We are very careful with his access to change so he doesn't put it in his mouth.  This isn't usually a problem until we're in the car and he sees a random quarter and dime in our cup holder for tolls.  When he gets fixated on wanting to hold them I employ the old Driving Coin excuse. "I'm sorry honey. Those are special Driving Coins.  Only the grow-up driving the car can hold those because they are special.  They have to stay up here so the driver can use them, okay?"  "Oh. Okay mommy. Special Driving Coins stay up there.  Me no touch them."  Ta da!

--We don't let Theo eat snack foods like chips unless it's in moderation and as a special treat.  As parents, however, Bryan and I can eat them whenever we damn well please, so we have to hide the bags of Pirate's Booty or Cheeto's whenever we buy them.  Occasionally we'll accidentally leave a bag out or Theo will be too quick to see before we put it away.  We are then met with whining and sheer determination to have a snack and no matter what reasons I give don't seem to work.  That is, until I had a stroke of GENIUS one afternoon.  Theo is in love with one of my co-workers.  Talks about her all the time and is convinced she is responsible for Christmas, she is just that wonderful.  So, at my wits end one day over the chip debacle I said, "That bag is for Miss O, honey.  Mommy has to bring her that bag of chips as a treat at work tomorrow so we can't eat them."  He literally stopped in his tracks and said, "Okay." and walked off to play.  Cue heavenly choir.

--We really try to limit his television watching to the weekends.  But that doesn't mean we are met with complete agreement on this household rule.  So when Theo gets up from his nap and the first thing he says is, "Me watch Veggie Tales on the tv Mama? I need to watch Thomas.  How 'bout Sponge Bob?" it's just easiest to say, "They're all sleeping.  They're still taking their naps so we can't watch them right now."  Nip THAT bad boy in the bud.

Now please realize we tell Theo everything to the best of his understanding and answer ALL of his questions no matter how long the string of Why?Why?Why? is.  I do not make a habit of lying to my child.  But really, sometimes the harmless ones are just easier.

What fibs have you told your child to keep the peace?  I might have to file away some good ones to be called upon later!

Comments

[Leandra]

Once, my husband told my daughter that if she didn't stop blowing on her toy flute that she was going to blow all the sound out of it and then it wouldn't work anymore. Blessed silence! :)

[Nilsa @ SoMi Speaks]

Well, I have no kids (yet). But, just the other night, I convinced Sweets that we shouldn't find out the sex of the baby, because once we do, people will start buying us lots of blue or pink stuff (and that's soooooo not our style). He seemed convinced for the moment it was a good idea. I don't consider it lying. I consider it offering another angle from which to consider your own position.

[Sarah Lena]

Things get "broken" a lot in my house as far as Tony's concerned. The Sit 'n Spin that was a gift two birthdays ago that plays REALLY LOUD TECHNO MUSIC? Broken. You can still sit and spin, obvsly, you'll just be doing it silently.

Also, we employ the "maybe later" technique a whole bunch. You just have to be careful and remember the "laters" and occasionally give in so he has some hope.

[Clarabella]

Gosh, I don't even think I consider the first one a "little white lie." Sounds more like the truth.
I am considering pulling a Sundry & telling Liam the TV is broken. He gets obsessive about shows & that's ALL he wants to do, watch the same episode of Dora/Yo Gabba Gabba/Oswald overandoverandoverandover and it's insane-making.
We tell him things are all gone ALL the time so that he will stop the excessive and persistent demanding of them, knowing full well the bag/box/etc. is plenty full still in the cabinet.
With toddlers sometimes it's just TOO exhausting to try and explain the "truth" to them. They just can't possibly understand everything.

[McMama]

I can't get over the fact that you don't have an iPass. I mean... WHAT? As for the lies, I wish I could get away with them (especially the tv one!), but my 5.5 y/o is just too darned quick for that and he lets the 2.5 year old in on the secret. :(

[Jen]

oh I LOOOOVE the tv characters taking a nap thing. You, my friend, are a genius.

Maggie still thinks the ice cream truck is a 'music truck' that simply drives around neighborhoods, spreading the joy of off-tune Christmas carols in June. OH YES. She's three and has NO idea there are yummy treats on that truck. I WIN.

[Maggie]

We use the broken one too a LOT! Also, we use the "spongebob or Thomas is sleeping" as well. For toys conveniently placed at Liam & Ainsley's eye level or food that has princesses or toy story at the grocery store that they demand, we say, "oh those are another child's. He must have left it there by mistake. We don't want to take it because when he comes back to get them and X isn't there, he would be sad." They say "oh" and we move on.

[Lisa G.]

Oh my gosh, these are all ingenius. If Yancy and I ever actually go there, I'm definitely using this as a reference.

I'm with McMama--surprised you don't have an iPass (just cause it's cheaper and you don't have to have all those coins on hand)--but still, the "Special Driver Coins," and Theo's respectful acceptance of them, is totally awesome.

[Chris]

I wouldn't know where to start. Wow, that makes me sound like a terrible parent!

[Belly Girl]

Characters are napping? That is PURE GENIUS. Love that so much.

I tried lying to my kid that I had NOT just eaten Oreos, and he grabbed my head close to him and practically put his nose in my mouth to smell me. Guess I'm a pretty bad liar.

[AndreAnna (Modern Matriarch)]

I always say it's broken and Daddy will fix it when he gets home. Usually they forget, and if they don't, guess whose problem it's NOT?

[McCashew]

These are all so great!

Caroline loves her gummy vitamins, so I told her that the magic jar only opens once a day and thanks to the child safety cap she can even watch it spin "locked" after she's had her once a day gummy.

[Equipoise]

These made me laugh because we do the same thing. The only specific one I can recall right now is this: Zoe has a bunny and frog that she sleeps with. I don't like her to take them out of the house because I don't want them to get dirty and I don't want her to be the nest Linus. So, when she asks why she can't take bunny or frog somewhere, I tell her that they are sleeping. They spent all night watching over her and now they need to rest. This satisfies her. She will cover them with a blanket and kiss them goodnight and that is the end of it. haha

[Kate]

Oh, we use the "sleeping" one all the time, usually in reference to the vacuum. Sorry honey, the vacuum went ni ni.

Keaton also wants to drink everything we drink, which is fine as long as what we have is milk, water, or, I'll even make an exception for lemonade, but if it is soda we say, oh no, you don't want that, it's aucky. Yuck.

[Shauna]

These are cracking me up! I feel better knowing I'm not the only one who tells these teeny white lies! The one that sticks out the most right now (which I actually got from my friend) is that the ice cream man plays the music when he's all out of ice cream. It works every time.

[Kelsey]

You can probably add all the sips of pop/soda (mostly out of my mother in law's glass) that Harper has ever had in her five years and it might make 4 oz. We always tell her pop is a grown up drink and she accepts. I know this won't last forever, but she knows not to ask us for it at all most of the time.

Also, add me to the list of disbelievers about the iPass, even we have one for the handful of times we drive through the Chicago area each year!

[Supra Shoes For Girl]

The last few days have been SO busy. School ended today and all the last minute flurry of activity has me "sleepless in Seattle." I could literally fall asleep here at the computer this afternoon, but as I wasn't able to complete this post last night I am filled with renewed determination to get it done this afternoon. I am SO very excitsdfed to be sharing these glitter techniques with you because as I stated in my previous post there is something incredibly different about this glitter.