Back To Me

Resolutions I will keep so help me

I need to be held accountable and I'm feeling ambitious so I thought I'd bust out my resolutions for 2009.  Go ahead, judge and laugh at my lofty goals. I'm used to crying I don't mind.

1.  EXERCISE AND I'M NOT JOKING. I bought 30 Day Shred and it's sitting in my living room.  I can do 20 minutes a day three times a week, right?  Right.  My kid isn't getting any lighter (27 pounds!  It's like carrying around a wet sandbag!) and I need to rebuild my core or my back is going to go out any minute.

2. Cook more and eat healthier.  Cooking and eating at home is better on the budget and gives us more control as to what we put in our bodies.  I have successfully made all of Theo's baby food so I may as well cook for the grown-ups in the family.  Though I can't guarantee everything won't be pureed. 

3. Spend more time with friends.  I can't really use the "I just had a baby!" excuse anymore for being antisocial. Though I work full time and am exhausted most days ending with a -y, I still need to get out more and have fun. Hangin' with my girls will put some pep in my step!

4.  Read before going to bed.  This may sound easy but it's not.  Not really at all, actually.  I haven't read a real book since February and it's making me sad.  I miss it so much and am going to make a point of reading--if only a few pages--every night before passing out cold.  It helps me sleep better, it's relaxing, and encourages me to use my brain for something other than What Else Can I Worry And Stress About Now At 9:30 At Night?

5.  Pamper myself more.  Oh goodness gracious have I let myself go.  Even in the simple lotions and potions department I am failing miserably and my skin shows it.  I'm going to be 30 in less than three months (AIEEE!  etc, etc.) and I'd really like to still feel like I'm in my 20's.  I also have to reset my current line of thinking that pampering = spending lots of money which is completely untrue.  Putting on perfume is easy.  Or adding a ring I like to an outfit makes me feel snazzy.  Throw in an at-home pedicure here and there, along with a facial scrub a few times a month and I'm well on my way.

6.  Spend more time In The Moment with Theo.  I get so excited thinking about his next milestones that I sometimes forget about where he's currently at.  He's growing up so freakin' fast I really need to sit back and enjoy what he's accomplishing and learning and not what is next on the agenda.  While I can't wait to hear him talk and can only imagine what amazing things will come out of his mouth, I savor his gooey babbles and will miss them terribly.  I could get drunk on is current string of "Loe-dee-doe-dee-doe-dee-doe" and I never get tired of it.  He is moving on to "Dat" and "Mama" and when I haven't heard our coveted "Loe-dee-does" in a while I prompt him to say them because I know time is running out.

I'm sure I have more, but this will suffice for now.  Are you all making resolutions?  If you are what are they and have you been successful in the past in keeping them?

Ways In Which I Am Trying To Chill The Hell Out

1).  I'm back to working out again.  I took a two-week break around the time my grandpa died and now I'm back in full swing.  It seems to be helping.  And I'm not going to mention how the reunion is rapidly approaching, thus kicking up the motivation factor 150%.

2).  Yoga!  FREE yoga!  Our health club now offeres free yoga with the free membership.  Saturday was my first class and it was awesome.  I'm still sore, but it felt good.  Rumor has it that next class we're doing some crazy headstand maneuver, of which I will be sitting that one out thankyouverymuch.  Because it's hard to remain stress-free with a broken neck (hey, that's what I hear, anyway).

3).  Aromatherapy shampoo.  I shower at night so this is a nice way to end my day.  It totally helps, if only for a short time.  Hey, better than nuthin'!

4).  Chanting:  "We are better off than a lot of people.  This is a rough patch.  Things will get better"  about 50 million times a day.

Sigh.

Status Quo

Sometimes I need to remind myself that my life isn't so bad.  In case some of you forget all the great things in your life, allow me to share some of mine (you can borrow as many as you'd like):

1. We have a roof over our heads.  And, most of the time, it's a nice freakin' roof.  We have a spacious apartment, we live in a safe neighborhood, and we don't have crazy white-trash neighbors beating their wives/girlfriends throughout the night.  This is something I take for granted, but when I think about it, it's a better situation than a lot of people.  We may struggle to pay the rent some months but really, it's not THAT bad.
2. Not only do we have a place to live, but the inside of our apartment is super sweet too.  I LOVE our apartment.  I love coming home to it.  We have nice furniture, a lot of books, a handful of DVD's, two laptops (boo hoo, right?) and cushy carpeting.  There are always things I'd like to improve around the house but I can be a little whiney bitch sometimes.  We're not living in squalor so sometimes I need to shut my trap.
3. Bryan and I are healthy.  That saying about "Well, at least you've got your health?"  Totally true.  Life sucks when you're sick and I've never even had a terminal illness.  A cold?  Please.  Sinus headache?  While not fun, it's nothing in the grand scheme of things.  I really need to appreciate that whatever ailment I may get is nothing compared to some.
4. Speaking of Bryan:  I have a fabulous husband.  Not only does he NOT abuse me emotionally or physically (jackpot!), he makes me laugh.  Every day.  He also cares about me with such a fierce passion that sometimes it renders me speechless.  I hope everyone can have as happy of a marriage as we have because it's so stinkin' fun!
5. We have a car that runs and doesn't make any questionable noises.
6. We are able to eat every day.  No, we can't go to a restaurant every night and have a five course meal, but we eat--and most of the time too much.  The fact that we can be so full we want to puke is something a lot of people can't experience.  As gross as it makes us feel, we should still be greatful.
7. I not only have a job, but a great one.  One that makes me proud.  And happy.  And greatful.  With the unemployment rate, this is a miracle in itself.
8. Amazing friends and family.  We are truly blessed and I am working harder at not taking all these wonderful people for granted.
9. Healthy pets, even though one of them smells really bad (*coughZachcough*)
10. I'm able to volunteer my time and talents to Young At Heart.  This makes me fulfilled in such an amazing way.

There you have it.  A little introspection isn't a bad thing, and I need it every once in a while.  My life isn't just good.  It's DAMN good.

They Say It's Your Birthday

My blog will be a whole year old on April 11th, and the first 365 days deserve to be celebrated in style. With that being said, I will be having a contest party, complete with a goody bag containing my favorite things. Details shall be announced closer to The Big Day, but keep your eyes peeled. I'm pretty proud of myself for what I have gathered for ye faithful readers. So get excited! I know I am.

As a side note, I'm hoping this blog won't steal my thunder since MY birthday is a week from Saturday. Last year was a tough one for me. I don't know why, since getting older never bothered me, but turning 27 made me depressed. (Please don't email me all "27?!? Girl you just a baby! Wait 'till you hit 30! Or 40! Or 50! Then talk to me about depressed!" because I don't want to hear it. We all are where we are in life. Doesn't matter if I'm still 'young'--I didn't like it. So there). I think it was because I wasn't where I thought I'd be in my life when I turned 27. I felt left behind. Stagnant. Kind of like I was having a quarter-life crisis or something. But this year! I'm feelin' gooOOood! Rockin' the cake and candles hard core. Bring it on Father Time, I'm ready for you!

Thanks for being here to celebrate with me. You guys are the best.

Wait for it. . . .

Not today.

Tomorrow.

The sun? Oh, it's shining.

Finally!

Wahoo!

The ice has melted around my cold, cold heart and I know how to smile again! Yeah!

Just wanted to touch base with y'all that I'm alive and well. Lot's o' stuff going on so I'm a mite busy, but will write more later this week. And speaking of later this week, I have a hair appointment! To get low/highlights! And to get it cut again! Praise the Lord.

So yes, things are looking up. And thank you for all your concern/well wishes/encouragement. You guys made me cry in a good way :-)

How about some resolutions?

I'll forgo the usual "Man, this year has really flown by!" and "Can you believe it's 2007 already?!?" and just cut to the chase.

Resolutions.  How 'bout 'em, eh?

I figure that if I publicly declare mine I will be more apt to follow-through, since I will have some accountability.  (That's you guys, FYI)  Drumroll please. . . .

1.  Take better care of myself.  For real this time.  This includes taking my vitamins, exercising regularly, eating better, making friends with the idea of portion control, and getting to bed at a decent hour.  I think this will be easy for me because we want to. . .

2.  Get pregnant some time this year.  I pray that 365 days from now I will be carrying a baby, no matter how far along I am.  The stick may have just turned blue--I don't care.  I don't know our fertility, and I understand that it may take a while.  Regardless, this is my number one prayer for 2007.  So technically this wouldn't be a resolution since it's basically out of my hands, but I just wanted to throw it in there for good measure.

3.  Cook more.  This will help with #1 and it will also help us to save money.  I also want to get in the habit of doing it so once we do have kids it will be second nature for me.

4.  Scrap more!  I have to just surrender to the fact that I work best at our dining room table and need all my stuff set up there for inspiration.  Once I take down our Christmas stuff I'm just going to haul all my supplies out there and be done with it.  Then I will be more inclined to bust out a page or two.  Circle Journal Round Deux is coming up the end of January, which is also when I am spening a weekend with friends at Embassy Suites to scrap.  Plus I'm taking two classes this month so I'm already well on my way!

5.  Take more pictures!  And print them!  The Campen household finally has digital cameras again and we couldn't be more excited.  I'm active on Flickr and can't wait to post more.  Plus pics will add a little more pizazz to this here blog, and I'll be able to scrap more too.  Thank you grandma! 

6.  Spend more time with family.  After what happened this year I really want to spend more time with them.  Some live out of state (not too far away!) and with my new vacation time for the year we will be planning more trips to see everyone.

7.  Work to make Young At Heart all that we know it can be.  Bryan and I were the 100th adoption after only being around for less than two years, so I know we can find another 100 forever homes for our senior animals next year.

8.  Meet more blog friends.  I'm totally serious.  If you're in the Chi-town area let me know.  And if I'm ever in your neck of the woods I'll give you a hollar as well.  Pseudostoops, Melinda, Zygote Daddy, HollyRhea, Maggie and Dawn can attest to my being sane (Well, sane enough to have lunch or drinks with for a few hours.  After that it's anybody's guess).

9.  Blog more.  Sorry about my absence as of late.  My bad.

10.  Learn more.  I want to learn how to sew so I may take a class at the community college.  I also want to learn more about the native plants and vegetation, so I'll probably grab a few books at the library and go on hikes with my best friend who is really good at that stuff. 

I'm sure there's more, like 'save money' or 'get a promotion' (yeah right) but those 10 pretty much sum it up.  I'm REALLY looking forward to 2007 and know it will be an exciting year.  I'm excited to know you all better and meet new people.  Thanks for wanting to join me on the ride.

Peace and blessings to you and yours.  Be merry and be safe.

Yes, I said paraplegic in a swiftly-moving wheelchair

That's Kirstin, my bestest pal with me at The Drake in March. We had such a fabulous weekend-- there was shopping, crafting, eating of some Baker's Square pie, drinking many glasses of wine, watching of two movies, getting hit-on by a paraplegic in a swiftly-moving wheelchair, dog walking, and lots o' conversation. It was just what I needed. We both agreed that we should live together in our next life. Fitted sheets would get folded properly, toilet paper would get replaced on the roll, needed groceries would get added to the list and the garbage would get taken out. So, what I'm saying is: the mini-vacation was amazing, it was nice to get away from the mundane, she's my best friend for a reason, and sometimes it's nice to not have husbands around.

I'm Going On Vacation!

Well, not really, but it feels like it! I'm spending the next two days with my bestest pal at her house and we're gonna do girlie stuff. Crafty stuff. Shopping stuff. Drinking and eating stuff. I can't even convey how excited I am. I need a break. Gotta get away for a bit and take my mind off all the crap that is plaguing our lives. I'm gonna giggle and probably act inappropriate here and there and I can't wait!!

For those of you who have emailed me and expressed concern for my 'funk' I do truly appreciate it. Most of the trauma is financial and I am feeling very desperate. Almost ready to crawl out of my skin. Ever since the semi accident it has felt as though we haven't caught a break. Like a shit-storm has been setting up shop outside our door and it sucks. My OCD is coming back and while I am on medication for it, it's a daily struggle to keep it under control. I also suffer from depression. That, too, has been a chore to reign in every day so it doesn't drag me down farther than I want to go. I was there 7 years ago and I don't want to go back. Not sleeping but not being able to get out of bed. Only eating cereal maybe twice a day because food holds no appeal (I know! I TOLD you it was bad!) while staying in a plaid bath robe. Being irratable and bossy. Crying at the drop of a hat. Not doing 'normal' things that I regularly enjoy. The list goes on. So if none of you think that sounds any fun, you're right! I'm trying to stay out of The Bad Place, and that is why I am SO thankful for the next two days with my partner in crime. Hopefully I'll gain a new and more positive perspective and come back a little more refreshed. If not at least I'll have some cute new things to look at while I'm munching on Frosted Flakes.

Be back in a few days!

The pictures speak for themselves.

BEFORE and AFTER: